Homophones: Your Doin' It Wrong
Did you catch that? Huh? Did ya? How about this one:
Eye I am not going to claim I am flawless when it comes two too to appropriately using words that sound the same (but are spelled differently/have different meanings)… But I will go so far as two too to say, if I due do it wrong its it’s an error do due to typing two to too fast as opposed to me knot not knowing they’re there their proper homophone-age.
And may I add… I don’t care how attractive a person is, a chronic homophone-offender actually loses attractiveness.
I think science has proven that. And Facebook. And texting.
Hitherhencetofore, I work really hard on proper homophonagessesei. I need all the help eye I can get. Herefollows Jenny On the Spot’s short guidebook for better homophone usage:
Your – possessive… for the other/another person. Your (I am pointing to you) purse. Your blog.
You’re – You are. Instead of writing YOU ARE, one would write YOU’RE. As easy as making pudding, folks. You + apostrophe + are = you’re. Pour + stir = pudding.
Their – Like your, but a group of people. Think of the i as a little person in that word. It’s a word used to talk about a group of people
They’re – They. Are. Again, easy as making pudding for a group.
There – a PLACE. Their (“i”) has to do with people… THERE has no “i” … hither hencetofore – no people… unless you are referring to people being “over THERE”.
To – that’s the one we use most… and we shouldn’t use it at the end of sentences but I am going to.
Too – this guy has an extra O… so think “in addition” or “more”… since it has that extra letter. If one wanted a bowl of pudding also… one would write, “I want one TOO!” One would not write, “I want one to.” Don’t do that. DON’T. Besides, that second sentence is a fragment and I would get angry with you because that sentence makes me feel like you are leading me on and I would be all, “You want one to… WHAT? TO WHAT?! To EAT. To SLAY? To PLAY WITH?” Don’t leave people hanging.
Two – That’s the number. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. 2. Two. “I would like TWO bowls of pudding, please.” If you want to bowls of pudding, I will scoop pudding in your hair.
See how homophone abuse is unattractive?!!!
Thank you for baring bearing with me hear here.
I hope your you’re knot not to two too upset with me four for going to their they’re there.
*Disclaimer… I taught history back in the ancient days, not grammar. But I could have gone either weigh way… Just know I am not a professional, but I sometimes get all hissy about stuff I am not really qualified to get hissy over… because I Cannes can.
*Update… my friend Anke suggested this video in her comment, and it was so PERFECT I had to come add it and make sure ya’ll see it. Gosh, I have the sexiest friends.
Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…
Use the Form Below to Leave a Reply