What To Wear Wednesday: The New Boots and Their High Acclaim

by | Dec 29, 2010 | Ridiculous, Style | 6 comments

The huz made sure these babies were under the Christmas tree. Yes, he is a GOOOOOOOD man.

prospectress bootsI could not wait to wear them. Out. I wore them several hours on Christmas day… in my kitchen. But these boots were made for walkin’, not cookin’!

I had a little errand to run a couple days after Christmas… Something having to do with my 5 and 8 year old daughters cracking the ever-loving life out of the touch screen of my iPrecious. I will warn you, the following picture is disturbing. View ONLY if you have a strong stomach (NSFW!):

cracked phoneI gag a little every time.

I have a non-cracked phone now, and I am thinking of renaming her… iDarlin’.

But I digress.

The boots.

As I left the mall after a successful broken phone resolution (the local Apple store replaced it for FREE, and I wasn’t even showing cleavage!!!). Now I am beholden to them forever and will forever be faithful.

As I left the mall… and made quite a walk back to my car… in my new boots… a minivan slowed.


It stopped. The driver cared not about the many cars now stopped behind her.

She cared only about my boots. She rolled down her window and emoted,


I was all, “Ummm… thank you! Thank you?”

On the way home, I wondered if it was actually a compliment afterall.

So I went to Dr. Google which, of course lead me to the urban dictionary.

My findings disturbed me.

So… did I look like a crack head? Did she maybe think I was a prostitute who worked the mall parking lot on Mondays around noon. Maaaaaaaybe what I thought was a “hot boot swagga” looked more like a gimp that caused crackal sweating???

OR was I simply pwning my Prospectress boots and she had to tell a girl.

It’s impossible to know.

Her physical reaction seemed to say, “Awesome boots, sista!” But the Urban Dictionary would assert that perhaps my boots didn’t work properly, or my boots had a dirty crack?

I choose to believe my new boot swagga was on-mark. I choose to believe that woman was smitten with my boots. Aaaaaaand quite possibly me.


Dear mercy… there’s nothing quite like a day trip to the Tacoma Mall in one’s crack a** boots.


Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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