My youngest, Lucy, has been in my homeschool system for, oh… 2 months. Give or take a week.
We’ve done lots of worksheets. We’ve done lots of reading. We’ve done lots of writing. She’s done lots of pogo-stick-jumping.
I’ve done a bit more teeth grinding and rocking in dark corners.
She has done all kinds of things I expected she would do.
But I didn’t expect to have to take her with me to my annual gynecological exam.
After nearly 14 years of motherhood, I finally had to take one of my spawn with me to the gynecologist. I am thankful for iPhones and that my doctor has a hallway with a chair and a very nice nurse.
While I was chatting lady things with my doc, Lucy was texting my friends…
She’s pretty good, ehh? And she spelled BUSY right! That was a word we’d been working on!
Due to that visit, I had to get myself into an ultrasound appointment .The gal I scheduled my appointment through didn’t make it clear what KIND of ultrasound I should be prepared to… to… receive… so imagine my wide-eyed state when my technician directed me to undress from the waist down.
Yep. THAT kind-of ultrasound.
I looked at the tech. I looked at the table upon which I would be inspected upon. I looked at Lucy sitting in a chair just below the stirrups.
I handed Lucy my phone and typed in my passcode faster than the quickest draw in the west, and scooted her into the waiting room. The waiting room where there was a sheriff who was escorting one of his… clients. Did I mention that?
I got a call later that afternoon from a nurse telling me I need some other type of ultrasound and some other test. I am trying to avoid Dr. Google. on that one. I have a month to wait.
I do not like waiting.
A few days after my ultrasound, it was time for MY FIRST MAMMOGRAM.
I am thankful for health insurance, but am not so thankful for my high deductible. I kind-of feeling like I am doing all this stuff like one might jump into a pool – eyes closed, nose plugged, and a hope I won’t drown.
Unrelated, did I tell you that our new puppy, Gus, has a real hankerin’ for paper? This dog will LITERALLY eat your homework. He has eaten my son’s and he even ate part of my mammogram referral:
Off to the Mammomat I went!!!
I should write a post on how bad it really was and wasn’t. It is not something I will ever look forward to, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.
So there’s that.
I went into the smooshing room and when I returned I discovered Lucy had taken over 300 pictures. Here’s one of the pictures I did not delete:
So we did a little homeschool field trip to Target where we got to talk about how much of her money she wanted to spend in one place, and then drive the customer behind us in checkout a bit crazy as Lucy counted our her money for the Barbie nail kit she bought.
I got a shelf for my mudroom. If you think that sounds like an inappropriate euphemism, it’s not. I totally bought a little shelf for my mudroom. But that would make a for a pretty funny euphemism, right? Just say that to somebody and then lightly nudge them with your elbow and wink…
Finally, for one appointment (hair) I had a childcare option (the husband working from home).
I left. Paul worked. Lucy got to tasking as she does. She tasked herself right into the garage with the hose and “washed” her daddy’s truck.
IN the garage.
I drove up, fresh from my root-reincarnation to see a veeeeeery wet inside of the garage and a Lucy standing outside of it looking mighty proud of herself.
“I washed daddy’s truck! I was in my working mode!”
Moral of the story: THANK GOODNESS waiting rooms don’t have hoses.