"Maybe you shouldn't drink so much coffee…" she says.

by | Jan 12, 2011 | Olivia, Parenting/Family | 11 comments

I was trying on this dress today:

My sparkle dress

Premiered at BlogHer in NYC, August 2010. Thankyouverymuch.

My beloved.

The entire dress is sequins.

And I use the word “entire” loosely… for it is a fine line between “dress” and “long shirt”.


I was trying her on, for she maybe be worn at an event very soon.

I needed to see if I could still zip her up and need to brush-up on how far I can bend before risking arrest for indecent exposure.

My 8 year old daughter came into my room. She has a pretty good eye for fashion, so I turned, put my hand on my hip and said, “So???”

She piped up, “I REALLY like that dress, Mom!”

I tossed my hair and told her I would take good care of that dress so she could wear it one day.

I shouldn’t push it like that.

Pride comes before a fall.

She says, “YEAH! I would LOVE to wear it when I’m almost 40!”

*blink blink blink*

Did she just call me “old”?

I said, “Well. Honey. You will probably be able to wear this when you are 20, maybe even SOONER!”

She giggled, “I won’t be that big when I am 20!”

Did she just call me “fat”?

I said, “Listen. I am the same height now as I was when I was 18. I haven’t grown AT ALL since I was 18.”

Her reply…

Well… maybe you shouldn’t drink so much coffee.”

The above comment was brought to you by the “Old Wives Tale School of Parenting” – “No, honey. You can’t have coffee. It’ll stunt your growth…”


Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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