What is THAT toy, Mommy?

by | Mar 11, 2012 | Parenting/Family | 10 comments

That title really opens the door to ALL DOWNHILL, don’t it?

And really, if you read to the end… well… you decide.


More specifically, plush toys representing giant microbes.

In this line of toys, one can purchase a plush representing the common cold, a maggot (!!!), red tide, lyme disease… MANGE… to name only a few. I mean, for those of you who have ever longed to snuggle acidophilus… YOU CAN! And really, these guys are really super cool and fun until…

(It’s all fun and games until someone gets their eye poked out…)

My children and I went to one of our my favorite stores (Fuego) to get a birthday present for my daughter’s friend. Much funkier (and even less expensive) stuff than Claire’s…

But over time, I’ve noticed Fuego has been shelving some racier items… like the book my daughter (9) pointed out that had something to do with older women pleasing younger men. The cover caught her eye — a long, hot female leg in a hot stilletto-heel stepping on the back of a young, muscley male. “What’s that book about?”


I turned her away, mumbling something about “not for you…” so we could focus on the accessories. Earrings, bracelets, coin purses, general bling…

We had barely decided on a pair of earrings when I heard my 6 year old ask-yell, “WHAT IS THIS TOY, MOMMY?” While holding it high above her head so I could see… since the place was PACKED with people and all…

a plush sperm cell

Class, can you tell me what this is???

it's a sperm cell

If you guessed SPERM CELLL – please come see me after class for your sticker! It. Even. Has. A BOW.

That’s right, my sweet little girl held a plush sperm cell above her head in a crowded store and in her NEVER quiet voiced asked what that cute toy (WITH A BOW!) was.


Tune in next week when I  become a giant nerve cell…

nerve cell

I will take my daughter back so we can find the egg cell. Then we will sit in the middle of the store where I will teach a short lesson in human reproduction. Should I create a sign-up list? I have been known to give extra credit!


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