*insert picture here*
What? Did you think I was gonna post a fool-picture of my nappy post-road-trip minivan?
Helllz-to-the-naw!
I have a reputation to protect!
Hey. I heard that snicker. I have a reputation… It may be a “I will wear socks when I can’t bear to sweep one more time” reputation, but it’s a rep nonetheless.
Totes.
All I am trying to say is this… I wish I had a scale to weight my car on before I vacuumed it out today. Cuz I am pretty sure she lost a good fihtty lbs (pronounce: elll-beees), and I wanted to be able to prove it.
That poor girl. She has been carrying around a lot of extra weight since we’ve returned. And I must add – she wears it well. I was all, “Gurl. All these Cheeze-Its, stale fries, solidified string cheese chunks, barbie shoes, twist ties, spilled mints, pencils, gum wads, crayons, pennies, *empty* cups, socks, tights, one shoe, one shoe, one flip-flop, two bowls, paper pieces, that one paper cup that was sitting for so long with 1/4 cup of liquid in it that the bottom rotted away… and whathaveyou times 3… did NOT EVEN make your butt look big!” She knows how to carry herself.
And as I vacuumed, and vacuumed and vacuumed I wished the Dirty Minivan Contest was not over. I think the state of my van would have given us a really good chance to win.
12 years ago… I never thought… ever. Good news is. My van will be nice and crumb-less-ish for at least 12 hours. I know, you envy me.
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