Swim 2.5 miles across a lake with little to no training and NOT die? DONE.

by | Sep 6, 2011 | Health | 3 comments

Swim for Life Finish Line

That’s me there on the far left. I’m happy because I am not at the bottom of the lake. The rest of those peeps are my team. 4 swimmers and a kayaker. The woman next to me is my friend Chris, and she is to blame. The kayaker (on right) was there to basically taunt us. He had snacks. About a mile into the swim (note: 1.5 miles to go on an EMPTY BELLY!) I realized I was quite hungry. I popped my head up and told him, “I’m hungry!”

He said, “I can give you a granola bar for $12.”


At one point I heard hissing come from the bottom of the lake. I was certain it was a fault that ruptured and we were going to get sucked to the center of the earth.

I gave myself a pep-talk, “Jenny. You are being ridiculous.” At which point my mind suggested instead the noise was from a missile heading straight for me or a preshistoric-sized dog-fish/pirana mix-breed… and he was probably ready for a mid-morning snack.

I am not good at open water swimming. Gimme chlorine and lanes. I can’t swin straight either. My right arm is a machine and I really could swim in circles all day.

Aaaanywho… As a result of my self-induced TERROR, I had picked-up my pace substantially. Like I could really outrun a ruptured fault line or missile. I finally convinced myself I was crazy or just going to die. Hitherhencetofore, I slowed down down in time to at least not die from a heart-attack.

Speaking of heart attacks….

3 DAYS ago I tried to run 3 miles… it was like nothing anyone has ever seen. Unless you’ve seen one of those movies with the horse delivering something very important… that is pushed to its limits and the horse neighs and fights and pushes and then just ends-up falling over from pure, utter exhaustion. And in the end, they have to shoot the horse.

I was almost that horse the other day. It wasn’t pretty.

Speaking of almost

If there is one thing I will ever admit that I am good at – it is swimming (in pools, not lakes or oceans… tho I did win a body surfing contest once… it matters not how many were competing…)

That said – if there is ONE regret of my whole entire life – it would be that I didn’t have the animal madness that would have driven me to force my parents into financial ruin so that I could have chased my dream to be an Olympic swimmer.


If only…

I totally relate to Uncle Rico…

OK. Time to go make tacos.



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