Introduce Vegetable Before Fruits: Mom to Mom-to-Be

I ran into the coffee shop.

Rather, I was RUN into the coffee shop.

By my children.

CAFFEINATE OR DIE… caffeinate or die, friends.

I paid for my triple grande iced white chocolate mocha – easy on the white chocolate. No whip.

*Side note: I only like white chocolate mochas that are made with white chocolate powder. Big Train is my favorite. TRUST ME. Furthermore, drinks made with white chocolate sauce is nastAY. Also, I am not a fan of white chocolate in general, but I am a fan of white chocolate mochas. Made with powder, not syrup… to be clear. In case you ever want to surprise me with a white chocolate mocha, I thought you should know.


I scooped up my iced cup of salvation and passed by 2 women and a preschool-aged boy. The ladies were sitting while the boy was… climbing. Madly. Just as a 3 or 4 year old boy does in a coffee shop while mommy is getting a little coffe time in. Bless that momma.

As I passed by, I overheard one woman advise…”Make sure you introduce vegetables before fruit. Wait on carrots and squash and… yadda, yadda…”

Upon closer look, yes… the other gal was mego-prego.

A young mom… encouraging, equipping… passing on advice to a probably very nervous mom-to-be.

My first thought?

LAME. The kid will never go for it. I wanted to step in and say, “Just do whatcha gotta do, sweetie. You will read and hear all kinds of stuff and think you have it all worked out and WHAMMO, SISTER… You’ll find yourself in the fetal position at 3 a.m. in the corner of your entry the first night home from the hospital because it was the furthest spot in the house away from the screaming baby… and eventhough the newborn is your third kid… the exhaustion and realization that you will never ever have any control will hit you like you never imagined. Oh, and nothing that you read or hear will ever prepare you for the level of defeat that is comin’ your way. For realz.”

But I didn’t. I stepped into the restroom… and looked into the mirror. I saw the woman who, 6.5 years ago laid on the floor of her entry in the fetal postion, trying not to hear the sounds of her newborn baby’s inconsolable cry (baby #3)… trying not to lose her mind because she knew it’d be weeks – IF NOT MONTHS – before she’d ever sleep through the night again…

I gave myself the stink-eye.. and decided embrace the age-old ritual that was happening between those two women in the coffee shop. The ancient ritual of motherhood… giving the best of what we know as a new one enters this sacred, confusing, and ultimately remarkable fold. Motherhood.

Veggies before fruits. Whatever. It’s more than that. It’s having someone who has been there… that helps calm those fears, that builds courage in one’s ability as one enters into this, this place… called motherhood.

Besides… then the baby is born and all bets are off.

But it’s good to have hope.


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10 Responses to “Introduce Vegetable Before Fruits: Mom to Mom-to-Be”

  1. lydia says:

    Okay I don’t have kids yet but thank you for this. Thank you for your honesty, because when that day comes, and husbandman and I are blessed with a kid, I’ll still feel somewhat okay at 3am in the fetal position. I’ll know that i’m defeated. . . . but still normal!

  2. Slow Panic says:

    Oh yeah. I’ve been there. And by there I mean the fetal position at 3 a.m. as far away from the screaming baby as possible. And that helplessness and defeat just keep coming at every stage.

  3. Diana says:

    I have a love/hate relationship with new parents for this very reason.

    They’re so cute all empty and wide-eyed, soaking up all the “knowledge”. On the other hand they’re so freaking annoying once they think they’ve grasped said knowledge and have it all figured out. I evil-laugh to myself when I think of them in the fetal position at 3am. That’s what they get — that’s what we all get — for “knowing”.

    For the record, this is what I know: as long as you introduce some kind of edible food stuff before booze you’re doing okay.

  4. Such a fabulous post Jenny! Oh, and I will remember the White Chocolate Mocha (powder not syrup) thing. Did you know there’s a Ghiradelli White Chocolate powder that you can order for your at-home versions? No? Well, now we’re officially BFF’s because my old neighbor was a crack add….I mean White Chocolate Mocha powder addict and she ordered those cans of goodness all the way to Hawaii – who cared what the astronomical postage was….Aaaannnywho 😉 Love coming by to “see” you my friend. Hope you’re having a fab week. I’m off to buy Hurricane supplies while sweeping up glass from that little Earthquake thingy that happened yesterday. {Ahem} Good times. Can I move in with you?

  5. meg duerksen says:

    this is awesome.
    i have been you. i have been the prego mom. i have been the veggie mom.
    and you are so right…..all bets are off.
    baby #1 or baby #5.
    babies don’t care who or where they came into….they are crazy.
    but man are they cute?!!!!

  6. shauna says:

    really great post! i really laughed! and i too feel like i want to step in sometimes when you see that look in peoples eye like they can find the secret to get complete control over their circumstances…and then i just walk by. it’s all part of the process….
    thanks for this funny rendition of this age old story.

  7. Kate says:

    I laughed and will be forwarding the link on to my girlfriend who has recently started talking babies. When I said, “I can’t tell you. No one can tell you. But when it hits you (and it will hit you) you’re gonna need someone to listen to you when you realize it’s like nothing you’ve ever done before. And I promise, even at 2 a.m. I’m your gal.” she just shook her head and said, “We’ve been doing it for thousands of years. Can’t be that hard.” Oh…honey…

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