In Honor of Learning Something New Every Day: The Perfect Tease

by | Nov 3, 2010 | Health | 5 comments

I spent the big bucks.

I didn’t get a dollar store bumpit. I don’t mess around, people. If I’m gonna get a bumpit, I am gonna get THE BUMPIT. Yeah – As. Seen. On. TV, yo.

If a girl is gonna go large, she needs to GO LAHHHHHHRRGE.

Actually, I used the medium sized bumpit. But it felt large to me.

the mighty bumpitDid I just call myself fat?

But I had no idea. I am child of the 80’s. One would think I’d have an intuitive sense when it comes to high hair.

80's hairIndeed. An acid-washed denim jacket too.

But back then, I really only understood bang height.

I never. I just. I was so young. So naive. So… comparably flat.

Lucky for me and you, and you, and you… and even YOU…  our teacher… the YouTube, the chief educator of society along with “Jerseylicious” (“I have no idea what that means…”, her frail voice wavers as she reaches for her cane…) has given us the way to attaining The Perfect Cheer Tease. Now I see.

The blind sees… And in my defense, how could I miss it. Our poor ozone layer…


Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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