I ran 18 miles yesterday. The word “ran” is a subjective word, really.
18 Mile Training Run Observations
But what I REALLY want to share here today is this: running is a VERY unattractive sport.
I mean, there are some good results, like the ability to wear cute jeans, but… I am learning the whole process of being able to wear a cute pair of jeans is pretty not cute. I digress.
Here follows a list of reasons why I think running is actually a pretty unattractive sport:
Rat’s/Bird’s nest hair:
Snot gloves – I bought special gloves so I could wipe my snot on them. I did.
And I love them. I also wash them.
Think about it… when you are out shreddin’ the pavement or trail, one’s nose doesn’t discriminate. Especially if it’s cold outside. I prefer the cold because running heats a girl up. I have used my sleeves, but when you wear a shirt that “wicks” it also wicks snot and that’s just gross.
Chafing – I suggest using BodyGlide to help prevent it as much as possible. But…
Hickies from your clothes – No pictures. It’s just not pretty. It doesn’t feel great and it is also… not pretty. Sure, the right clothes help, but I kind-of wonder that after three hours of jolting one’s body around while being completely drenched… is there any way to avoid clothing-provoked hickies? I think not.
Hills – They are sooooo not attractive! I even created a hill-grader chart for your easy reference
Fashion – Yes, there is some mighty cute work-out clothing available these days. However, when you run along ditches and want to stay ALIVE… runners who dare to run along the same roads as cars, must wear colors NOT found in nature:
I think this is smart, but not at all cute. When I am driving I see the ugly yellow jackets and vests WAY before the cute gal wearing bright pink. Yes, bright pink is good, but it’s not blinding yellow.
The things you long for when at mile 9 of a 18 miles run in the freezing rain – Katie and I were sooooooo cold after running 1.5 hours in 36 degree rain that when we passed the EMU topsoil place she suggested we go cozy up in a pile of the Emu “topsoilness”.
OR (and this is Katie’s idea) we got so cold Katie wished out loud, ” I wish I was a Jedi so I could slice “that cow” *Katie points to innocent grazing cow* open with my light saber and cozy up inside.”
Maybe it was the hypothermia speaking.
Your toes… your poor, poor toes…
Obsession about a well-placed potty stop – Be it pee-pee or something more, *ahem* substantial. The thought of an accessible potty locale is never far from one’s mind. Never before in my life have I done so much planning around bathrooming.