I’m gonna be honest here…
I am not a fan of Vegas.
(Confession: I had to Google DJ Pauly D. This could either mean I am culturally irrelevant or SMART.)
(Unrelated: Were I a DJ, I would choose the name DJ Sparkle Jenny Z. LMNOP.)
We don’t gamble. We I tend to spend my hard-earned cashola on coffee, shoes, glitter, and costume jewelry.
And the mortgage.
The wedding was AWESOME. It was at some standard-issue Las Vegas chapel. But the BEST part was we (meaning me, the hubs, and a few of Paul’s colleagues) went in together on the wedding gift – we rented an Elvis impersonator to marry the couple AND be their limo driver.
Vegas is so classy.
As is/were we.
And now the not-awesome part.
My beloved and I were low on cash. Perpetually. We were fresh-out-of-college grads and I was student teaching.
Plus, we had just pitched-in gas money to go to Vegas AND went in on an awesome wedding gift. So we were actually extra-low on the el cashola.
How did we afford anything those days?
Aaaaaanywho…
We gave ourselves $20 to gamble… it was our first time in Vegas so we figured we should EXPERIENCE VEGAS.
$20 was big spending.
Aaaaaaaaaaand we lost it all.
It was a slow bleed at the nickel slots.
AND IT MADE US SICK.
It was the equivalent to a life-changing bad-bad-purchase decision sick.
That $20 was A LOT to lose.
I don’t remember if we ate beans for a week, but I do remember how desperately sick we felt on our 4 hour drive back home.
And it probably didn’t help that the 4 hour drive home was stupid late at night.
In someone else’s not-so-comfortable car.
With the windows down the ENTIRE drive.
So the driver wouldn’t fall asleep.
Oh, and the drive was my husband’s BOSS.
And it was FREEZING.
Read: Desert. Late. Night. Freezing. For 4 hours…
AND a 2 hearts-full of REGRET.
That drive home was even more miserable than that one time in high school … a 4-hour ride home on the school bus after getting soaked on the Roaring Rapids at Magic Mountain while wearing jeans.
It was 100 times worse than even THAT.
Nothing quite as miserable as the mind-numbing freeze of regret and worrying about how to buy food the next week.
Nowadays, when someone says, “We should TOTALLY go to Vegas!” I can’t help but feel a *leeeeeeeeettle* MEH about the whole idea.
Honestly, I’d rather keep driving…
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