A lesson in grace.

by | May 3, 2011 | Family & Friends | 5 comments

grace
A lesson doesn’t always have to be dramatic to be a “lesson”.

Sometimes the softest, most subtle things can imprint one’s heart and mind.

Let me set the stage:

If I were to choose one word to describe me lately, it would be “scattered”.

I doubt any of my friends would argue that.

Right, friends?

Right.

So.

I would say this scattered nature of my is a bit irritating. Especially to the not-scattered. Or even to the also scattered. I know when others are scattered and I am already scattered it can be even more infuriating… I am going to digress if I don’t stop.

See?

SCATTERED.

My condition can have a negative affect on others. I realize this.

My chaos can cause more work or effort or reorganizing – on the part of others.

Hitherhencetofore, I think some folks could really get irritated with me.

Today I came across a situation where a gal coulda totally been irritated with me.

And even if she WAS irritated with me, I COULDN’T TELL.

I did see a moment of panic… I could see her wheels turning… but OH MY GOODNESS SHE CHOSE GRACE.

GRACE.

She did not owe me grace.

You know what keeps me from extending grace to others?

My pride.

My RIGHTS.

Someone else’s oversight, or stupidity or whatever… earns me the right to have a pissy response. Yes? I believe this is a generally held opinion. It sounds horrible written out, but let’s be truthful – it’s true. We have a right to feel irritated in these circumstances and express that irritation.

However.

Just because it is justified, or a perceived “right”… it doesn’t mean it IS right. Or best.

To be honest, I struggle desperately with extending grace. I’m a score keeper. I am an ENFJ – J for JUDGER. When situations occur where I feel I am owed or wronged or at least not at fault for the chaos… it is very hard for me to not want justice to be served. To teach a lesson. I stand in judgement.

I feel 8 years old all over again. My lifetime plight of competing for all things to be perfectly fair.

Having grace extended to me shifted my day. It may have shifted the days of others I came across… a good ‘ol ripple effect… of goodness.

It’s amazing how easy it is to show kindness… yet how hard it is (for me) to let go of…

Of control?

My rights?

So, fresh off my “given much grace” high… I feel inspired.

And now that my kids are in bed.

The aforementioned inspiration may or may not have gone on hold for about an hour and half while I was not being graceful about the fact that the kids were not going to sleep.

But I’m inspired again. Now that they are recharging angelically sleeping…

It’s my turn to sleep. And recharge. And start another day tomorrow.

Perhaps this is a good moment to pose a challenge – what ripples are you hoping to create?

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